Patience is a virtue and I dare to say especially in a BDSM relationship. And it’s usually those who matter most to us that we tend to be the least patient with.
Unfortunately in BDSM in the most cases it is about rushing in to play, scenes, and starts by giving the sub a million and one protocols, rules and rushing into a Owner/submissive relationship.
” If you want build something solid, it will always take a solid time”
My statement is that my Dominance is a gift to give, and the submissives submission is something I value, therefor it take time, I will correct myself : it takes a lot of time.
If I don`t have the time as a Dominant to learn about my submissive, how can I give her the best I can give her, there is no value in giving anything away before I know that she is worth my gift, and yes , this should be the exact same way a submissive should be thinking. The gift you as a submissive want to give me as a Dominant is first deep and genuine if you want me as your Dominant because you have seen overtime that I am worthy your submission, This means who I am , what I stand for, What I belive in, is worth the gift, there is no value in it if you give this to everybody and everyone.
We might all have expirience in our lifes when we give something away and it is not appreciated, most likely where this started out wrong is that you give something away impatiently. There is no value in the gift , because “easy come is easy GO!”
When we act impatiently towards someone, it might end up totally the opposite of what you hoped and wished for. It communicates that I give away what say I cherish the most, but it really do not matter who will be my submissive.Then the Domination automatically loose it`s value.
And I know so many in the BDSM comunity who gives away alot without any meaning.
Offcourse you can meet People from the BDSM comunity and play, but there is no deepth in a one-night stand, there is no value over time in random play.
The big risk by beeing impatient is also at risk of taking my submissive for granted. If left unchecked, these feelings can weaken the sense of safety in our BDSM relationship. At first, lack of patience may seem like nothing to be concerned about. But this can start an unhealthy BDSM relationship.
Patience is necessary if we are to see the best in each other. It’s needed to keep our BDSM relationship meaningful and inspiring. In fact, if one isn’t making a conscious effort to learn to appreciate my submissive every day – taking time to seriously consider her needs – I can’t expect my relationship to grow. More often than not, such a BDSM relationship loses its purpose and meaning. A valuable and essential connection is lost.
A quote I read is as following: ” patience is a bitter thing, but that the fruit of it is sweet.” The truth is we have to work at building our BDSM relationships if they are to give us the Sweet fruit.
Therefor is the beginning and patience of a BDSM relationship so important we learn to love because of someone’s best qualities and learn to love them, in spite of their worst. However, a lack of patience not only highlight someone’s best qualities, but also makes it impossible to tolerate their worst.
However, to build a solid and stable future with someone, patience is not just something to hope or wish for, but is an essential component that must be achieved. It is a necessity, not a luxury in our lives.
Solid BDSM relationships are built on solid individuals and Patience builds character.
Patience shows your submissive that she is loved for who she is and I value her and our relationship enough to see beyond her “faults.”
Therefor it is also important that my submissive is patience, because I as a Dominant want to be loved for who I am, what my value is and our relationship is strong enough to see beyond my “faults”.