Dominants are often thought to have the easier ‘job’ in D/s relationships and this is not so.
Just as the submissive, the Dominant has very important duties that I must tend to. Dominants have the responsibility of creating all the rules for the D/s relationship. The Dominant also has the task of enforcing these rules and follow up on consequences once they’re broken.
Dominants have the responsibillity to train the submissive in a way that makes her grow and prosper in all aspects of her life.
Dominants also make important decisions for themselves as well as their submissive. Doms must constantly think of the safety of their submissive. This task alone is a very important task not to mention my duties to understand and take care of the submissive’s wants and needs.
Comparatively the duties of the Dominant and submissive are similar in importance. Each role has their own personalized responsibilities and liabilities. How do we decide on who carries the heavier load?
I feel as if the Dominant holds the most responsibility if not solely for the fact that I directly deal with the well-being of another living being. Some s/m practices can be dangerous and without a well researched Dominant these dangers can be realized. That fact in its self is a large factor and something I must deal with every time I play. Beyond the physical safety, I must uphold the submissives mental safety as well.
I have to know my submissive in ways that other relationship partners do not. I have to push her limits, ease her concerns and test her commitment all without necessarily having her verbal input. I would definitely say as a Dominant I have to know my submissive as good as I know myself. If that isn’t a momentous responsibility then I’m not quite sure what is.
It’s important to embrace the responsibilities you do have and to act with great diligence when performing those duties.