We should all have goals in life and I as a Dominant also need to set goals for my submissive.
The goals come from training , and again this is just my point of view , what works for me may not work for another Dominant.
What makes our world so awesome is we can be who we want when we want. Our level of communication is just incredible.
As with anything though we all have to take steps. A Dominant has to take steps, it is a progression progress, these steps are guidens to Reach goals and develop as a Man and a Dominant.
Where things blow up or get out of hand ,I as a experienced Dominant always try to find answars and keep a critacial eye on my own actions and never forget to stay focused on my goals.
Just as I set goals for my property I have to set my own clear and goals for where I want to end.
I always say ” Begin With the end in mind”
What do I need ?
What do I have to do to Reach my goal at the end.
Where do I want to be? What type of relationship do I want ? What submissive do I need? Where do I want to be a year from now ? And who is Worth beeing in my life ?
These are steps that we need I think about before I start walking. Yes that even means putting a plan into place and following that plan.
What is more important is when I set my goals I stick to them , and one by one , day by day complete each goal, this is not rocket science and it is much easier than most make it out to be.
Reaching goals is all about choises, the choises must be Clear and by having to choose, you also need to take choises that might be tough at the presant, but will help me to stay focused on: ” Begin With the end in mind”
Destraction from my goals will always just be destraction and the hardest part is sometimes to take the choise over what is a destraction and what will help you to achive what I really want.
Is this selfish ?
Hell Yeah, reachong my goals is all selfish, but I never abouse others or take advantage of others to Reach my own goals.
This is one of the bacic rules of self-developing, My goals should never effect another person in a negative manner.
And as I always say….if it is easy, it just don`t have any value !
And this is just the same about goals……easy goals are just that….EASY !
The upside of everything is it takes work because nothing is handed to you, no one can complete your goals for you.
This is the first rule of being a responsible man and Dominant.
Work and achive something, stay passive and Accept what is handed to you.
This is where my own Worth comes to play…..
A true Dominant Worth has a great value for the right submissive.
I am proactive in my actions, I am proactive in beeing focused on reaching my goals, thats because I know my value, but also my weaknesses.
This is the easy part of setting goals, the hardest part as a Dominant I also have to set Clear goals for my submissive.
This do not mean that I are responsible of her actions, but still iam responsible for her to Reach her goals.
Just by Reading the sentence above you probably understand that helping a submissive Reach her goals, I as a Domiant have only half of the Tools, this makes this part even harder to pursuit.
This is where rules and protocols comes to play for my submissive…..and also therefor the goals I set for my submissive should be easy to understand and always With the focus to improve her, not change her.
Improvement is the biggist motivator in setting goals, and I as a Dominant the prize to see a submissive to Reach her goals and watch her improve !
I started With my own goals, and I also said that my own goals are the easy part.
This is where a true Dominant shows his value because my submissive’s should always come first no matter what.
Because when I see other persons develop I get the biggest satisfaction ever possible as a Dominant.
Honesty and integrity first and for most , we want respect but we have to show it first. I need to be truthful from the start.
One of the first things we tell someone we just met is , you must always be truthful, always tell the truth no matter what. I want honesty out of my submissive because I give the same in return.
I am open on goals and what I want to gain to my submissive, because I want my submissive to undertand whats my motivation.
Rules , Structure , Protocols and Goals helps a submissive to fall into place. They key to what I just stated also falls under consistency , and being consistent on a daily basis.By beeing Clear and consistent the submissive will devlop even more.
If I want someone to follow me , I want someone to submit to me , I want someone to turn over Control to me, well then I gotta step up to the plate and promise I can and will step up and I will guide them every step of the way..
When we train we train to fit our needs, we train to fit our wants so it is only fair we give back more than we take. If we take a 100 % we should give back 100% this is what i Call the golden cirkle of Domination.
I never set goals or demands something of my submissive I dont live by my self.
This is the art of giving !
Goals are set for self improvement , goals are set to help in everyday life. Goals can be small or as big as life changing focus.
Goals can be from getting up at a certain time, completing small task through out the day.
All goals should be met with positive reinforcement, reward always work best in the long run.
Some not all but some come with problems , be it self esteem , home life , daily life or just smothered in personal problems, maybe depression or other types of illnesses.
Before anything we should take the time to help mend what ever is going on before we enter the aspect of the relationship.
This is the value of giving before getting anything in Return.
The two in the parties in a relationship should sit down and discuss goals and why they are needed. Goals how ever should not be a punishable offense. Goals and positive Reinforcement does not equal being punished.
Remeber as I just said reward is the key motivator.
If we set goals then I should be there to help , I should be there to guide , and give advice when needed.
Never treat a goal like a rule , because then it is no longer a goal. Goals are meant for self improvement for my submissive.
What I as Dominants want is to see her grow inside and out, I want to build booth up , even if it means just maintaining their health , making sure they are stable.
Once you reach that goal you need to continue support, so I can maintain that Level for my submisisve , and again that comes with positive reinforcement.
So if you are in a relationship and there are no such plans in play , and your relationship is just about rules and being punished , then maybe your best interest as a submissive does not come into play…..