A Dominant/slave relationship isn’t something that can be described as static. While your partner may not change for years at a time, that doesn’t mean the level of your relationship has to stay the same. In fact, as you and your slave work together, it’s a good idea to push each other’s boundaries to see just how deep you can take the relationship and the power structure. As a Dominant, you want to spend some time working on pushing the boundaries of your slave in order to ensure they are continuously learning and growing in their role.
What are the Boundaries in Your Relationship?
Before you can begin pushing your slave, you need to sit down with them and talk about what the contract between you already states. This will help you both to see what you think are the boundaries, whether they need to be changed, etc. Ideally, your slave should create a list of things they want, a list of things they never want, and a list of things they eventually want to try. The things they eventually want to try is the list that will help you see what boundaries you want to push. Since the slave is not necessarily comfortable with these items right now, you will be pushing their edges and making them grow in their role as a slave. Using other commands you might use for other tasks, you can see how they perform when they aren’t sure what’s going to happen next
A New System of Dominance
Pushing boundaries can lead to a completely new system of dominance as well. For example, instead of being the domineering Dominant that barks orders, you might want to try being calmer and just more steady in the way you deliver tasks to your slave. While this might not seem like a way to push someone’s boundaries, if you change the way you act with your slave, they will not necessarily know what you are up to – which can make them more on edge than they have been in a while.
Or you might simply want to change the way you interact with your slave in a scene. You might ask for your slave’s trust as you push boundaries as you see fit, allowing them the chance to tell you to slow down or to stop if things get out of hand.
You want to push the boundaries of your slave because that’s the best way to see just how hard they can work and how much they can learn. No one wants to learn the same things again and again, so you need to make sure there’s always something new around the corner.