The boundaries

A Dominant/slave relationship isn’t something that can be described as static. While your partner may not change for years at a time, that doesn’t mean the level of your relationship has to stay the same. In fact, as you and your slave work together, it’s a good idea to push each other’s boundaries to see just how deep you can take the relationship and the power structure. As a Dominant, you want to spend some time working on pushing the boundaries of your slave in order to ensure they are continuously learning and growing in their role.
What are the Boundaries in Your Relationship?

Before you can begin pushing your slave, you need to sit down with them and talk about what the contract between you already states. This will help you both to see what you think are the boundaries, whether they need to be changed, etc. Ideally, your slave should create a list of things they want, a list of things they never want, and a list of things they eventually want to try. The things they eventually want to try is the list that will help you see what boundaries you want to push. Since the slave is not necessarily comfortable with these items right now, you will be pushing their edges and making them grow in their role as a slave. Using other commands you might use for other tasks, you can see how they perform when they aren’t sure what’s going to happen next

A New System of Dominance

Pushing boundaries can lead to a completely new system of dominance as well. For example, instead of being the domineering Dominant that barks orders, you might want to try being calmer and just more steady in the way you deliver tasks to your slave. While this might not seem like a way to push someone’s boundaries, if you change the way you act with your slave, they will not necessarily know what you are up to – which can make them more on edge than they have been in a while.
Or you might simply want to change the way you interact with your slave in a scene. You might ask for your slave’s trust as you push boundaries as you see fit, allowing them the chance to tell you to slow down or to stop if things get out of hand.
You want to push the boundaries of your slave because that’s the best way to see just how hard they can work and how much they can learn. No one wants to learn the same things again and again, so you need to make sure there’s always something new around the corner.

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The Cage and Obedience

The cage will always be the main physiological tool for me to make a good well focused slave. And that, is what all this is about, don’t you think?

Almost always, they ask when the next obedience class is and how to sign up. I then explain to them that while obedience training is a very important factor in raising a well-mannered, focused slave, obedience training is not the cure for every slave training problem.  Behavior Modification is the means to resolving behavioral issues.

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Obedience Cage training my slave is not punishment for her, Cage training is all about control and taking my slave into the mindset of complete surrender of will.
The cage is HER place and it will in time be where she feels safe, secure and finds comfort. Once she comes to that conclusion she has taken a level forward in letting go. she has finally accepted who she is and that she is an owned slave without the will to be back in control again. training a slave while very important in her training cannot accomplish behavior modification. In fact, teaching obedience commands to solve a behavioral problem can and often does get in the way of helping the slave resolve her problem.

Obedience should be the single most important concern for my slave, and this releases the slave from almost all other concerns. Obedience is the foremost principle through which right and wrong is assessed by me as a Owner.

Behavior modification utilizes the behaviors differently. Significantly, behavior modification programs address the underlying reasons for the problem behaviors. This is done by identifying, analyzing and appropriately reconditioning the slave’s out ward physical signs which indicate the slave’s internal physiological and psychological state. It is the underlying physiological and psychological state that behavior modification alters and which obedience training cannot address. Although there are similarities among obedience training and behavior modification, behavior modification differs in goal, outcome and reward structure. It IS hard work and there are no quick fixes.

The vast majority of behavior problems that are presented to me are the result of inappropriate communication, over-permissiveness (spoiling) other times, problems are simply the result of unfortunate relationship dynamics. Fortunately, most of these problems are resolvable with good work from me as Dominant. It always important my slave is the clay, with the whip I will shape her , with humility I will mold her and her true beauty lies in her obedience for my her Owner , how I mold, raise and training my slave will have a huge impact on how my slave develops.
A slave is the most precious possession I as a Dominant own.

The breath play

Breath play is one of the most effective parts of a BDSM relationship.
We have know  pictures speak more than a thousand Words and in this case this is true!
Breathplay is all about:
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I don`t have a safeword for my submissive, but when I chock my submissive she has the opportunity to give me a signal, she knows by tapping my hand twice she gives me a heads up that Im pushing her to her max….. but that beeing said it`s never certain that I stop even if she gives me  the signal.
Im in Control always….thats the Principal of beeing a owner and always be in Control of any given situation.
It is always my responsibility to read and see the reaction of my submissive also when im playing with a higher risk as breathplay is.
Its all about trust and Control, but hell its also about :
Power, belonging, ownership, her sexy neck, my firm grip, strenght , surrender and its HOT as Fuck ! 🙂

I have always enjoyed the power exchange aspects of BDSM. Breath play is an activity I consider to be a perfect demonstration of the control and trust inherent in our relationship. My submissive must trust me implicitly, It puts her completely in my hands and to take control over one of the fundamental requirements for life. That level of power exchange is the essential nature of dominance to me.

Of course, this is a form of edge play. Breath play involves a risk which both my submissive and I as a Dominant need to be aware of.
There are not many Things within the BDSM play thats more effective then breath play.
My submissive told me that its just like a drug beeing chocked by me.
Its highly highly addictive for her, and I know that Im just in the begining of the breath play.

This is the article from wikipedia:

Author John Curra wrote, “The carotid arteries (on either side of the neck) carry oxygen-rich blood from the heart to the brain. When these are compressed, as in strangulation or hanging, the sudden loss of oxygen to the brain and the accumulation of carbon dioxide can increase feelings of giddiness, lightheadedness, and pleasure, all of which will heighten masturbatory sensations.”[2]
Author George Shuman describes the effect as such, “When the brain is deprived of oxygen, it induces a lucid, semi-hallucinogenic state called hypoxia. Combined with orgasm, the rush is said to be no less powerful than cocaine, and highly addictive.”[3]
Concerning hallucinogenic states brought about by chronic hypoxia, Dr. E L Lloyd notes that they may be similar to the hallucinations experienced by climbers at altitude. He further notes that no such state occurs in hypoxia brought about by sudden aircraft decompression at altitude. These findings suggest to him that they do not arrive purely from a lack of oxygen. Upon examining the studies on hypoxia he found that “abnormalities in the cerebral neurochemistry involving one or more of the interconnected neurotransmitters, dopamine, 5-hydroxytryptamine, and β-endorphin had been reported in all the conditions associated with hallucinations.”[4]

The purpose of breath play is a many delightful things. But it is also about achieving a light headed feel from the lack of oxygen which can be a very erotic sensation for my submissive, and hell I haven`t really started yet!!

The Dicipline and the Punishment

Educating ourselves about the differences and the similarities refines our methodology and improves the relationship between me and my submissive.

As with other critical discussion areas within the lifestyle, the philosophies behind discipline and punishment should be fully explored and discussed in the beginning stages of the relationship.
My submissive should know the difference and sholud be shown the difference by acting out and showing her the difference between dicipline and punishment.
So whats the difference ? ?

Discipline is training that corrects. It molds, empowers and enhances my submissive for the better. Punishment comes when there are consequences set for my submissive when she displeases me, breaks a rule, or misbehaves.
Discipline is a teaching relationship that goes on between me and my submissive. It is to mold my submissive into what I not only wants, but feels will improve my submissive. Because if she is improved she will obviously be a better submissive.
To me discipline is the day-to-day structure established for a submissive by me, whose goal is to teach, guide, and mold my submissive how to live to serve me better and also enhance my submissive as a person. The goal of discipline is eventually self-discipline or self-regulation. I can’t baby-sit my submissives 24/7. So I want my submissiv, when I am away from her, to have a system of rules within them that they will use to govern her behavior toward themselves and toward others. Gradually, that molding of the behavior, way of living, thinking and believing becomes self-discipline.
Discipline does not always carry with it punishment. Discipline can be as simple as a look or gesture. Discipline is the reinforcement of behavior. It is the framework where a submissive resides. Sometimes you can have punishment that exists separately from discipline. The two aren’t always linked together, but in certain instances they coincide.
First off punishment is not to be confused with S&M play. S&M is for “enjoyment” – by definition, “play” is typically enjoyed by one or both parties.

Therefore if punishments are consequences of violating rules or otherwise displeasing me, then punishment should be cold, to the point, and not enjoyable by my submissive.

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Punishment is something my submissive should want to avoid. There are many that believe a submissive will “purposely” act out to get punished. There are several different reasons why a submissive may act out on purpose.Often times they do not know how to communicate their needs to me as her owner !
I need to have the ability to read and learn my submissive, and also her way of acting.
A punishment should clearly identify what was done wrong, what can be done to correct it, and why the infraction displeased me. I allways clearly identify the means in which the punishment is to be carried out, then it should be handled as soon as possible. After punishment is administered there should be absolution – forgiveness. A process of accepting the consequences and punishment of a violation and moving forward. Once a punishment is carried out, I never carry it over, nor should my submissive keep kicking herself . A punishment is a sense of closure for both me and my submissive and should be embraced as such.
Making the distinction between discipline and punishment is important. It is critical to understand the process of both and how they are separate.
If my submissive is thought the difference it is up to me the owner always to be consecvent on both discepline and punishment.
Because the clearer I am , the better Dominant am I for my submissive.

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